okies

dan dandan dan Posts: 1,263Member
edited April 2017 in Totally Not Guitars
okies... gonna sound kinda weird. and tox, this one's barred for you :p, whats the most romantic (i.e. best way to get a "yes", or "i do") way to propose? ladiesh? romantic blokesh? lol, just a bit of research here...

Comments

  • tgfmtgfm Posts: 865Member
    dont mention sausgaes \:D and everything will be fine

    watch loads of movies and see what happens in them \:D thats all i can think of, but i wouldn't listen to me at the moment

    tim \:D
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    Try this:

    "Darling, there comes a time when one has to, well, give up their hopes and ideals, to let go of the notion that they'll get to spend their life with some one they love and are attracted to. There comes a point when you just have to snatch at whatever vaguely appropriate mess is within reach, a dry, rotten piece of wood to which you may cling just to keep you afloat, to save you from the depts of lonliness.
    Darling, now is that time for me, so, will you be that piece wood to which I may cling, to float forever with dreams of what life would have been, had I found a true and worthy love"

    That'll get a reaction outta her, I guarantee it ;\) .

    [ 19 April 2004: Message edited by: Martel ]
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     Quote:
    Originally posted by Martel:
    Try this:

    "Darling, there comes a time when one has to, well, give up their hopes and ideals, to let go of the notion that they'll get to spend their life with some one they love and are attracted to. Their comes a point when you just have to snatch at whatever vaguely appropriate mess is within reach, a dry, rotten piece of wood to which you may cling just to keep you afloat, to save you from the depts of lonliness.
    Darling, now is that time for me, so, will you be that piece wood to which I may cling, to float forever with dreams of what life would have been, had I found a true and worthy love"

    That'll get a reaction outta her, I guarantee it ;\) .


    *writes this down* It's rather long....
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    Stick an onion ring on her finger whist in the chippy and say "how bout it luv?" then leave her to think about it while you eat the cod'n'chips..Face it if she says no you've managed to eat a whole cod'n'chips without having to share and she gets to eat the onion ring...Everyones a winner \:D
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     Quote:
    Originally posted by 24th fret:
    Stick an onion ring on her finger whist in the chippy and say "how bout it luv?" then leave her to think about it while you eat the cod'n'chips..Face it if she says no you've managed to eat a whole cod'n'chips without having to share and she gets to eat the onion ring...Everyones a winner \:D


    Possibly the stupidest thing I've ever read....

    Brilliant \:D .
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     Quote:
    originally posted by tgfm: dont mention sausgaes and everything will be fine


    ok whats going on with the sausages dude \:D
  • tgfmtgfm Posts: 865Member
     Quote:
    Originally posted by The Flyin Squirrel:


    ok whats going on with the sausages dude \:D


    havnt you heard?

    i didn't mention the sausages, and then the darkness came along and saved my bacon

    and the sausages could have ruined it, but they didn't \:D

    tim \:D
  • RhodesRhodes Posts: 1,584Member
    I went for the traditional proposal - I got up on to one knee. ;\)
  • LooseMooseLooseMoose Posts: 1,716Member
    I proposed whilst lying in bed after Coffee first thing in the morning whilst on holiday in Dublin.

    I think I said something like: (we had been discussing what to do that day on a budget of 10 euro)

    "There *is* something I want to do today...I'd like to go shopping for a ring, as I'd like us to get married...will you marry me?"

    So we went crazy on the credit card ;\)

    Cheers,
    James

    P.S. Spookily, the place we bought the ring from (just off Grafton Street on the way to Powerscourt) has now closed - shame, as we went back to look at the wedding bands this Easter - Oh well! \:D
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    So many people are married on this forum. I'd be like, 'I want to marry you cos LooseMoose told me to' anyway, Guitars are much better than women.
    Well, first of all, I agree...guitars can't break your heart...that's a plus.

    Second...guitars don't mind if you have more than one...women, on the other hand....

    Third...you can stroke a guitar all you want, but women get tired of it.

    Fourth...a guitar costs less in the long run...it's a one-time fee (except for the minimal fee of strings, picks, and such)

    Fifth...all you have to do to turn on a guitar is flick a switch (rarr..)

    Sixth...you can make a guitar sound the way you want it to easier than you can with a woman.

    Seventh...you get to play with the accessories you buy for your guitar...not so with women.

    Eighth...guitars aren't as cruel as women...sure, guitars can hurt your fingers if you play with it to much...but if you play with a woman too much, she'll hurt a little more than your fingers.

    Ninth...nobody calls you a pig if you don't like a guitar 'cuz of its body.

    Tenth...understanding guitars is MUCH easier than understanding women.
    \:D

    [ 20 April 2004: Message edited by: Pinky ]
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     Quote:
    originally posted by tgfm: havnt you heard?

    i didn't mention the sausages, and then the darkness came along and saved my bacon

    and the sausages could have ruined it, but they didn't


    no tim, no i havn't.
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     Quote:
    Originally posted by LooseMoose:
    I proposed whilst lying in bed after Coffee first thing in the morning whilst on holiday in Dublin.

    I think I said something like: (we had been discussing what to do that day on a budget of 10 euro)

    "There *is* something I want to do today...I'd like to go shopping for a ring, as I'd like us to get married...will you marry me?"

    So we went crazy on the credit card ;\)

    Cheers,
    James

    P.S. Spookily, the place we bought the ring from (just off Grafton Street on the way to Powerscourt) has now closed - shame, as we went back to look at the wedding bands this Easter - Oh well! \:D


    You had a credit card and you where just of Grafton Street, and you bought a small gold Hula Hoop. ARE YOU MAD! Don't you know that's where all Dublin's best guitar shops are!?

    Seriously, what was the name of the shop? I don't think RG will mind, unless they're opening up a jewelery section.
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    OK, this is a serious suggestion (you were looking for serious ones, yeah?). Oh, and all this is assuming your girlfriend is nice and normal (insofar as that word can be applied to wimmin) and not a loony with local bicycle tendencies. ;\) It also assumes that it's going to be a (welcome) surprise for her.

    First of all, lay a spot of groundwork for later. Go and ask her father, in person and private, if you can marry her daughter. Sure it's unnecessary and old-fashioned, but it's polite and gracious (you want to project a good image both to your girlfriend and her family). It also gives Girlfriend's Da an opportunity to voice any possible concerns that need clearing up - better to sort niggly things out now than later. We'll assume he says "yeah, please get take this money drain off me" and does a happy dance, but if he says no you can still leave his house with useful thoughts about your relationship (like why he doesn't think you're ready for marriage or what you need to do to improve your relationship). On the day you pop the question, you don't even need to mention that you've done this, in fact, better you don't, because that way she'll find out from her father and you'll get an "Oh, xdan, you are so sweet!" and possibly something more er...adult. ;\)

    Now for the main event. You are going to cook her dinner in an empty house, either yours or hers. If either of you live with parents or roommates, get rid of them, you don't want any interruptions for the whole evening. Also turn off your mobiles, unplug the phone etc - you don't want to hear a monophonic rendition of the William Tell theme coming from that Nokia in her handbag just as you're about to pop the question. You must not take her to a restaurant. This is a private matter, and you want to do it in private (and not just because you might get lucky afterwards, unless you or your gf believe in no sex before marriage). She'll want it done in private because it's an intimate, romantic moment between the two of you, and it shouldn't be shared by a room of strangers. You will want it done in private because you may well be ****ting yourself, and you don't want that room of strangers watching you as you do this (fumbling words or barfing on your girl's lap is A Bad Thing).

    Now, I said there that you're going to cook. If you can't cook, you're going to learn how to, just for this one meal*. Remember, the cooking itself is a romantic and thoughtful gesture, which would be devalued if she helps you or if you microwave something your mum made earlier. ;\) You need to pick a dish that both of you like, but that you don't have very often. You may be tempted to cook her her favourite dish, but remember that you need to be eating as well, so pick something that isn't going to make you chuck on account of your nervousness. Also bear in mind that cooking will give you a sense of accomplishment - would you really want to remember for the rest of your life that the dinner you "cooked" for your wife on the night you proposed actually came from the local takeaway or was done beforehand by your mum? I didn't think so.

    *Addendum to this bit: If you can't cook yet. When you've picked your dish a couple of weeks beforehand, get someone else (your mother, her mother, whatever) to show you how to cook it. Then buy a load of the ingredients and cook it as many times as you need to get it down pat (just like learning a song on guitar, really). Only eat enough of each trial to test it properly, you don't want to be bored of the dish when the big question dinner comes round! Your family/housemates/pets may get bored of eating garlic prawn and spinach ravioli, but it'll be worth it in the end. And remember to hide these activities from your gf. If she's coming round to your house, stash the ingredients somewhere obscure. If you already live together, do the trial cooking at a friend's house or your parents' house and lie about why you have to be there all the time (hint: decorating takes ages).

    Of course, you have to get her round on the night without arousing any suspicion on her part. The best way is just to invite her round for dinner without inferring anything else, but the problem then is that she could turn up dressed in sweat pants and a tank top - not clothing usually associated with romance. The way to counter this is simply to ask her to dress reasonably nicely. The ensuing problem is that she's gonna suspect something. Which means you can break out the big ol' book o' fibs for this one. The first suggestion I can think of is to say that you're celebrating a small win on the lottery or a promotion or a passed exam or something (can be fake, can be real, doesn't matter much as long as you don't contradict yourself). That way, she'll see the dinner as a celebration, rather than an occasion for proposition. The second is to reveal to her that (if the above unable to cook advice applies) you've been having cooking lessons, and that the night in question you are finally ready to let her try what you've learned. You want to make it special, so tell her that she should dress up a bit. Naturally, you will be reasonably well-dressed too, but bear in mind that you'll need to cook in whatever you wear. Buy a big apron, and not one with boobies on it. If you live together or are having the dinner at her place, you can use a different approach. Just go into the bedroom, pick out something nice (dress, blouse, PVC catsuit, whatever), tell her that she looks beautiful in it and suggest that she wear it for the lovely dinner you're about to cook her.

    Now, on to the location. The kitchen is usually less than glamourous, especially if you're cooking something pungent. If there's a dining room in your house of choice, use it. Put a clean tablecloth on the table, along with placemats, coasters, and all the necessary cutlery, glassware etc. Also pop on a vase (or two if you get one big enough to split) of red roses or, if she doesn't like roses, her favourite flowers. Close the blinds and the curtains. Put some big candles (the thin type you see in restaurants, not tealights or treetrunk ones) in a well-polished candleholder thing on the table. Only light them when you're just about to serve the meal, otherwise they'll have gone all melty while you're cooking! You may also need to turn on a small table light in the room in order to have enough light to see your food - you don't want your future wife eating in the dark, unless your cooking really sucks bad.

    On a similar note, make sure you have everything you need in terms of drinks, condiments etc ready beforehand. If you're having wine, make sure to warm or chill it a sensible amount of time before the dinner. Make sure you have any salt, pepper, tartare sauce, mustard etc on the table before she sits down at it.

    Now you need to pick a day that's appropriate. For most people, Friday and Saturday evenings are the best choices. If your gf is wrecked or likes to slob around on a Friday night after a hard week at work, go for Saturday, but otherwise either could do. Friday is good because if you don't get her the real ring beforehand, you can take her shopping for it the next day, to save her waiting. If you go for Saturday evening, she'll be well-rested after her day off, but it will also give you all day Sunday to possibly shop (see more about rings below), but more importantly a whole day to spend together doing whatever intmate things you may choose as well as telling friends and family and discussing wedding plans. Sunday itself is a poor choice IMHO because every Sunday evening you get that "Ah nuts, only X hours until work on Monday morning" feeling. It also means that you would be apart the next day.

    OK, onto the ring dilemma. I can't speak from experience here (the engaged/married forumites might be able to offer concrete advice), but from my musings there are two viable ways to do this whole thing as a surprise. The first one is that if you know a) her ring size and b) what she would want in an engagement ring, you can buy the actual ring beforehand and present it to her as you pop the question. The second method requires that you know a) her ring size and b) her taste in ordinary rings. This way you can buy an inexpensive but pretty ring that she'll like, give that to her on the night, and then take her out one day afterwards to allow her to choose her own ring. This method is a safe one in that if she picks her own ring, she's not going to be disappointed, but it also has the drawback of her knowing exactly how much it cost. There is a minor bonus in buying the cheap ring too - she can wear that out when she doesn't want to wear the expensive one. So you can always get her that one as well if you go for method 1. If you're confident enough in your knowledge of her taste in engagement rings to go for the first method, it can win you some brownie points - she'll like that you know her well enough to spend so much money on the ring. It will also save you an entire Saturday being dragged around town by your new fiancée while she has a fit of the jewellery lust. ;\)

    The night itself. You can forego a starter (remember, you probably won't be hungry), but have a dessert ready in case you need it. I think the best time to pop the question is right after she's finished her main course. Don't worry about clearing up just yet. Give her some time to burp or let her last mouthful go down or wipe her mouth, check you have the ring in your pocket (you remembered to put it there beforehand, yeah?) then go round to her side of the table. Gently turn her chair around so that you have plenty of room to kneel. The obvious step now would be to get down on one knee. Take her hand, kiss the back of gently, and then put the question to her. Don't try to be funny or clever, just get straight to the point, e.g. "Britney, will you marry me?". You can always add her surname if it sounds right when you practice your lines on the cat, or if she may be in any doubt as to whom you're talking. If she says "yes", you can do the hugging and kissing, then when she phones her best friend and parents to tell them the news, you can clear your plates and glasses away. When she's done phone calling the really important people, you can relax together on the sofa and eat your dessert. You can always have the dessert beforehand if you can stomach two courses pre question-popping.

    And that pretty much concludes Pedro's Guide To Popping The Question. Obviously that was a fairly generic rundown of how to go about it, so you'll need to think how you can adapt any or all of it to suit your own situation. I hope you find some of it useful or stimulating, and if you want to discuss any aspects further, that's fine. Regardless, good luck! \:D
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    Jesus christ Pedro!

    Thats some well thought out stuff right there. Ever thought of writing for some kind of mens magazine? The bit about the boobies was funny. \:\)
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    F*****g hell Pedro, you've been thinking about proposals alot! Are you planning (or expecting) one sometime soon!?

    Just a couple of things:


    "ask her to dress reasonably nicely" and "so tell her that she should dress up a bit"
    Should probably rephrase that. Women can find a negative implication in ANY sentence. The obvious one here is that her dressing nice would be unusual. Better off, IMHO, inviting her around for a "fancy meal" or some such rather then directly telling her the usual rags ain't up to scratch.


    "Now for the main event. You are going to cook her dinner in an empty house, either yours or hers. If either of you live with parents or roommates, get rid of them"
    Hmmm, probably a good idea to move in before you get married, as it's a good way to find out whether or not you can stand prolonged exposure to each other. Better to find out before hand, as a divorce can take a long time and a lot of money (you taking note Tox :p ). It's a serious business marriage, well, unless you're American that is....

    The rest sounds spookily good. Kudos Peter.
  • ZombieSheepZombieSheep Posts: 220Member
    Sorry to disagree with everything that's been said so far, but....

    No. 1 thing to remember. Be yourself. Don't write down a speech someone else has written. Don't learn to cook for the occasion. Don't let nerves turn you into a gibbering wreck. If she is going to say yes, she is going to be accepting a proposal from the guy she knows, not from someone trying to be someone else.

    FWIW, I proposed in the Military History section of Shakespeare's book company on the banks of the Seine while on holiday in Paris, but then, my wife is a librarian... \:\)

    [ 20 April 2004: Message edited by: ChilliJam ]
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    thinking of popping the question anytime soon pedro? ;\)

    David
  • LooseMooseLooseMoose Posts: 1,716Member
     Quote:
    Originally posted by Martel:


    You had a credit card and you where just of Grafton Street, and you bought a small gold Hula Hoop. ARE YOU MAD! Don't you know that's where all Dublin's best guitar shops are!?

    Seriously, what was the name of the shop? I don't think RG will mind, unless they're opening up a jewelery section.


    I know...I could feel M***c M***r calling me in to buy the Daphne Blue Relic Strat, but hey, a d00d's gotta do what a d00d's gotta do...

    I'm trying to remember the name of the shop, but it's changed hands apparently. If you get to the entrance of Powerscourt, there is a little Coffee shop there (I can be found there on at least one fortnight of the year ;\) ) and if you're staring out of the window, this shop was in your line of sight...

    Cheers,
    James
  • Christ Pedro, someone must have been turned down alot at the proposals.
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     Quote:
    Originally posted by LooseMoose:


    I know...I could feel M***c M***r calling me in to buy the Daphne Blue Relic Strat, but hey, a d00d's gotta do what a d00d's gotta do...

    I'm trying to remember the name of the shop, but it's changed hands apparently. If you get to the entrance of Powerscourt, there is a little Coffee shop there (I can be found there on at least one fortnight of the year ;\) ) and if you're staring out of the window, this shop was in your line of sight...

    Cheers,
    James


    I likes M******n I*c myself, always too many Goths playing BC Rich guitars in M***c M***r for my liking, though they do sell Parkers so I forgive them. I'll keep an eye out for that shop.
  • DaveBassDaveBass Posts: 3,316Member
    The most romantic way to propose is while you're having sex with your future wife after a few days apart.

    Like I did.

    Dave
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     Quote:
    Originally posted by DaveBass:
    The most romantic way to propose is while you're having sex with your future wife after a few days apart.

    Like I did.


    Dave you big stud .

    Good idea though. As this is a family forum I'll avoid making any jokes about fingers in rings...
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    as a divorced bloke can I suggest - 'will you sign this prenuptial agreement?'!
  • pakamakpakamak Posts: 153Member
    after being together for a couple of years, i said to the missus that i would marry her anytime she wanted to - just so she knew

    she then brought it up herself a year or two later, i asked her dad and we went shopping for a ring

    now we have a little screamer to add to the equation - and he rocks!!

    do it how it feels right for you is all.
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     Quote:
    Originally posted by Trevman:
    Jesus christ Pedro!

    Thats some well thought out stuff right there. Ever thought of writing for some kind of mens magazine? The bit about the boobies was funny. \:\)


    No, but I have been thinking about writing "professionally" in the last few months. Maybe I should send FHM a sample? ;\)

     Quote:
    Originally posted by Martel:
    F*****g hell Pedro, you've been thinking about proposals alot! Are you planning (or expecting) one sometime soon!?


    No, and even if I were, it would be kind of silly to post it on a forum my girlfriend visits... ;\) But she can content herself in the knowledge that I have several much better ideas in the early planning stages for sometime in the future. \:\)

     Quote:
    Originally posted by Martel:
    "ask her to dress reasonably nicely" and "so tell her that she should dress up a bit"
    Should probably rephrase that. Women can find a negative implication in ANY sentence. The obvious one here is that her dressing nice would be unusual. Better off, IMHO, inviting her around for a "fancy meal" or some such rather then directly telling her the usual rags ain't up to scratch.


    Very true, but like I said, every aspect I covered can or may need to be adapted to suit the individuals concerned. If Mr Xdan knows his girlfriend well enough to get married, I'd imagine he knows the best way to convey "dress up nice, woman!" without just blurting it out.

     Quote:
    Originally posted by Martel:
    "Now for the main event. You are going to cook her dinner in an empty house, either yours or hers. If either of you live with parents or roommates, get rid of them"
    Hmmm, probably a good idea to move in before you get married, as it's a good way to find out whether or not you can stand prolonged exposure to each other. Better to find out before hand, as a divorce can take a long time and a lot of money (you taking note Tox :p ). It's a serious business marriage, well, unless you're American that is....


    Again, a good point, but it's not like he's gonna propose this week and get married the next. Nowadays, a lot of people stay engaged for years before actually getting married. Setting a wedding date roughly 18 or 24 months on from the proposal (which is not an unusual occurrence) could well give them enough time to live together and see if it works. I thought that kinda went without saying, but, plenty of stuff for xdan to think about! \:\)

     Quote:
    Originally posted by ChilliJam:
    No. 1 thing to remember. Be yourself. Don't write down a speech someone else has written. Don't learn to cook for the occasion. Don't let nerves turn you into a gibbering wreck. If she is going to say yes, she is going to be accepting a proposal from the guy she knows, not from someone trying to be someone else.


    No-one said anything about a speech, but it really doesn't hurt to know what you're going to say beforehand. And learning to cook is hardly trying to be someone else. For starters, it's a romantic gesture - going to a lot of trouble for one special evening. And let's face it, men kinda need to know how to cook these days, so it really wouldn't hurt to have that talent if you don't already - after all, if the bloke can cook, it means the couple can share that workload throughout their marriage. I'd consider that "getting off on the right foot", but naturally xdan needs to think hard about how his gf will react to the various aspects of whatever proposal he settles on.

    Also, you make a fine point about Paris...romantic breaks there are potentially a good idea, as long as neither party hates Frenchies. ;\)
  • Options
    Yeah, what Pedro said! \:D
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    I was pretty much going to say what Pedro was going to say, except mine would've probably run on to about a paragraph rather than 3 pages and not covered quite so much ground ;\)

    But it's got to be what you want to do, use a broad idea like making a meal, sure, but you have to tailor it, not copy. Whatever the method, it simply has to be both romantic and special/out of the ordinary. If you do it on the bus, you'll just regret it for the rest of your life.
  • dan dandan dan Posts: 1,263Member
    erm... thanks for the responses lol... \:\) i just came on and saw "research..." and wondered what it was, i then noticed it was my topic... imagine my surprise when i had forgotten about posting it the night before! lol, i might have to ask my girlfriend to marry me later then! :rolleyes: i wasnt even that drunk! more tipsy really... oh well, it gave me laugh! cheers for your effort pedro, sorry bout your fingers for making you type that!
  • Options
    I've got good stories from a couple of friends about less orthadox ways of doing it. One of them just decided they'd been going out long enough, brought a ring and told her boyfriend they were getting married, and the other had to get married otherwise her Visa would expire (she's from America and they met on holiday, she came back to stay and make it work though). I don't have any advice, I just think they're great stories. And I'm drunk.
  • just what ever you do, don't do it as a joke while giving her a ring fo her birthday, who knows what might happen ... tox, i'm lookin at you here :rolleyes:
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